Recently, the universe has invited me to upgrade my impact (again)....
Through my almost 4 years in business, I have changed my "niche" more times than I can count. But what was actually happening was I was upgrading and stepping even further into my purpose.
It started with helping women grow their businesses using mind mapping and organizational tools, now I consider myself to be The Governor of Leadership.
I am creating governance through which all leadership flows.
To be blunt: I decide what leadership is.
It takes a large amount of self-awareness to stake my claim as The Governor of Leadership, some might even argue that it's arrogant. What other people argue isn't my business.
The universe has given me this assignment and there is nothing else in life for me to excel at but this. My work will impact hundreds of millions of lives, this I have always known.
But the path I'm traveling to create that impact has become even more clear, and for that I'm grateful.
So with that being said, the universe blessed me quite profoundly the other morning with my first piece of governance: The 5 Commitments of the Unprecedented Leader.
All of my clients are leaders who are building things that have either never existed before or they are completely revamping outdated systems. Either way, there is no structured precedent or blueprint for them to follow.
And because of this, they lack direction for how their leadership should look and feel during their build.
This is where the 5 Commitments come in.
We live in an age where anything built in the dark will eventually come to the light. These 5 commitments assure that unprecedented leaders only build in the light and create a new wave of leadership and human infrastructure that is committed to diversity, evolution, and transparency.
The way things should have always been before greed, capitalism, patriarchy, and white supremacy got in the way.
So below, you'll find the 5 Commitments and what they require of you as an unprecedented leader.
Please allow yourself to soak them in. To feel the responsibility of what is being asked of you as a leader who is building from scratch.
And remember that my 1:1 work is always available to you when you are ready to accept full responsibility for the calling you have on your life.
The 5 Commitments of the Unprecedented Leader
Any leader or founder building something that has never existed before or is working to improve a severely outdated system must adhere to these commitments.
Commitment to the self
Not in a selfish way
But a commitment to knowing yourself, trusting yourself, to deepening your relationship with who you really are.
This is the cornerstone of everything it is you will build.
Commitment to Diversity
Building something that has never been built before requires it to be built using different voices and perspectives in order to preserve all of humanity.
All genders, ethnicities, races, cultures, brain spectrums, ages, and sexual orientations
Commitment to Releasing the Status Quo
Not building according to what others dictate to be “best practice”
When building something unprecedented, there is no best practice.
There is only trust in the self and the collective minds to establish an entirely new infrastructure.
Commitment to Transparency & Communication
When building something completely new, leaders must be open and transparent about what they are building because of its effect on humanity or the constituency it governs.
This commitment also inherently demands honesty and truth because that is naturally what transparency and regular communication requires.
Commitment to Evolution
Recognizing that everything changes and must evolve over time. Stubbornness and attempting to remain the same does more damage to what was built than evolution ever could.
An excellent embodiment for all 5 of these commitments is NYC Mayor Zohran Mamdani. He is unlike any leader the city of New York has seen before.
His cabinet is diverse (I mean he made Stanley Richards, an ex-Rikers inmate, head of the Department of Corrections)!
His social media is full of transparent communication about every decision he makes.
He knows the way NYC has been run has stifled the growth of the city and it's citizens and he is committed to its evolution.
He refuses to take notes from his predecessors who have only helped the rich.
And you can just tell that he trusted himself in his run for mayor. He knew within his whole body that he could do this job. And he is. Quite well.
This is what leadership should have always looked like. But there were no true guidelines to hold the magnitude of it.
Now there is. Because I have created and spoken life into it.
I'm excited to see where you leadership takes you, now that you have governance to show you the way.
There’s a lot of talk these days about how society has become hyper-individualistic — and while that’s not untrue, I want to make something very clear:
Individualism and self-preservation are not the same thing.
And confusing the two? That’s where the real harm happens — especially for people learning how to lead, parent, create, or exist in this world without burning themselves to the ground.
I teach leadership through self-preservation.
But the more I watch the world online, the more I realize how many people are calling survival “selfish” or equating self-preservation with narcissism.
But the more I watch the world online, the more I realize how many people are calling survival “selfish” or equating self-preservation with narcissism.
So let’s break this down.
Individualism is a Trauma Response
Let’s be real: individualism is a symptom.
A side effect of living under patriarchy and capitalism for way too long.
A side effect of living under patriarchy and capitalism for way too long.
Patriarchy tells you your worth is tied to how much you provide.
Capitalism tells you your worth is tied to how much you produce.
Capitalism tells you your worth is tied to how much you produce.
So you spend years — decades — providing and producing.
For your kids, your job, your partner, your community.
And what do you get in return?
For your kids, your job, your partner, your community.
And what do you get in return?
For most people, the answer is: nothing.
No rest.
No peace.
No support.
No peace.
No support.
And then one day, you wake up angry.
You say, What about me?
You say, What about me?
You’re bitter. You’re exhausted. You’re tapped out.
So you swing hard in the opposite direction — into me, me, me.
Into hyper-individualism.
So you swing hard in the opposite direction — into me, me, me.
Into hyper-individualism.
Into a survival response masked as self-focus.
But it’s not self-love — it’s self-protection built on resentment.
But it’s not self-love — it’s self-protection built on resentment.
That’s not leadership. That’s a nervous system collapse.
Self-Preservation Is Innate
Now let’s talk about what self-preservation actually is.
It’s not narcissism. It’s not a tantrum. It’s not spiritual bypassing.
Self-preservation is sacred.
It’s instinctual.
It’s that quiet, inner knowing that says:
It’s instinctual.
It’s that quiet, inner knowing that says:
“If I don’t take care of myself first, I’ll have nothing left to give.”
It’s not rooted in bitterness — it’s rooted in love.
It’s the difference between survival mode and sustainable wholeness.
Because someone who’s self-preserving isn’t closing off the world — they’re fortifying themselves so they can show up for it with more capacity.
When you self-preserve, you’re saying:
I want to pour from a full cup.
I want to give, but not from depletion.
I want to lead, but not from martyrdom.
I want to pour from a full cup.
I want to give, but not from depletion.
I want to lead, but not from martyrdom.
Here’s the Difference You Can Feel
The energy doesn’t lie.
Individualism repels.
It says, “I’m out for myself and screw everyone else.”
And people feel it. They walk away from it. They don’t want to be around it.
It says, “I’m out for myself and screw everyone else.”
And people feel it. They walk away from it. They don’t want to be around it.
Self-preservation attracts.
It says, “I care enough about my impact that I’m making sure I’m whole before I try to serve others.”
It says, “I care enough about my impact that I’m making sure I’m whole before I try to serve others.”
And when people feel that?
They want it too.
It inspires a ripple effect — a quiet revolution of regulated, grounded, self-led humans who still care about community because they first cared about themselves.
They want it too.
It inspires a ripple effect — a quiet revolution of regulated, grounded, self-led humans who still care about community because they first cared about themselves.
Leadership Through Self-Preservation
When you lead through self-preservation, you’re magnetic.
You’re not demanding attention — you’re embodying it.
People look at you and say:
You’re not demanding attention — you’re embodying it.
People look at you and say:
“Damn, she takes care of herself — and she still shows up with power and generosity.”
That’s the kind of energy that builds movements.
That’s the kind of leadership that heals instead of harms.
That’s the kind of leadership that heals instead of harms.
So no — self-preservation isn’t selfish.
It’s not individualistic.
It’s not individualistic.
It’s the antidote to burnout, bitterness, and performative power.
And if you’ve ever been made to feel guilty for choosing yourself —
Let me say this plainly:
Let me say this plainly:
The world doesn’t need more martyrs.
It needs more leaders who refuse to lead from depletion.
It needs more leaders who refuse to lead from depletion.
Being an eldest daughter often means shouldering expectations that start so subtly, you might not even notice them at first. Picture this: growing up, you were the one always given the dolls and cleaning playsets that nurtured you to care for others. But that might of come with hidden burdens of Eldest Daughter Syndrome, where societal and familial roles quietly shape our paths from childhood, often leading us into caretaking responsibilities that sideline our own aspirations. We dig into the roots of people-pleasing tendencies that blossom in families with emotionally immature parents and offer insights on breaking free from this cycle.
Feeling the weight of perfectionism and family expectations isn't just a mental battle—it's a physical too. Many of us in the "Worthy" community know all too well the anxiety and overwhelm these pressures cause. We explore how emotional suppression can manifest as physical ailments, and delve into the intriguing idea that ADHD and PTSD symptoms may be threads in a tapestry of inherited family trauma. Despite facing critique for tackling these topics without a medical license, we stress the importance of acknowledging and addressing our mental and physical health to enhance our well-being.
Reclaiming your independence starts by redefining what it means to truly be free. We talk about the difference between self-sufficiency and genuine independence, and how releasing unrealistic expectations allows us to embrace our feminine energy. This shift makes room for healthier relationships and personal growth, where setting boundaries becomes an act of self-love. We aim to inspire a journey toward self-discovery, encouraging listeners to reclaim their personal power and financial success.
Episode Highlights:
Exploration of Eldest Daughter Syndrome:
Alexis takes a deep dive into the psychological and emotional challenges faced by eldest daughters. She explains how societal and familial expectations often trap these women in roles that prioritize others' needs over their own. This syndrome, while not medically recognized, manifests in patterns that can significantly impact one's well-being.
Alexis takes a deep dive into the psychological and emotional challenges faced by eldest daughters. She explains how societal and familial expectations often trap these women in roles that prioritize others' needs over their own. This syndrome, while not medically recognized, manifests in patterns that can significantly impact one's well-being.
Impact of Perfectionism: Eldest daughters are often burdened with the expectation to excel in every aspect of life, leading to perfectionism.
Breaking Free from Family Expectations: Examine the pressures imposed on you by family dynamics and cultural norms. Challenge and redefine these expectations, with setting boundaries and focusing on self-care and self-love.
Embracing Feminine Energy: The concept of feminine energy as a means to achieve true independence. Embracing this energy can lead to healthier relationships and a more balanced life. The difference between being self-sufficient and being genuinely independent, is the importance of letting go of control and reducing anxiety.
Embracing Feminine Energy: The concept of feminine energy as a means to achieve true independence. Embracing this energy can lead to healthier relationships and a more balanced life. The difference between being self-sufficient and being genuinely independent, is the importance of letting go of control and reducing anxiety.
Three Action Steps to Take:
Recognize and Break the Cycle of People-Pleasing:
Recognize and Break the Cycle of People-Pleasing:
Reflect on your upbringing and identify patterns of people-pleasing and self-sacrifice that may have developed due to family expectations. Start by journaling about moments when you prioritized others' needs over your own aspirations. Once identified, consciously practice setting boundaries and saying no when necessary to prioritize your own well-being and goals.
Redefine Independence and Embrace Feminine Energy:
Differentiate between self-sufficiency and genuine independence. Consider what true freedom means to you beyond fulfilling familial roles. Embrace feminine energy by allowing yourself to relax, delegate tasks, and receive help from others. Practice releasing control over situations and trust in your decisions, which can lead to healthier relationships and personal growth.
Focus on Personal Healing and Self-Discovery:
Begin a journey of self-discovery to understand your true identity beyond familial labels. Engage in activities that nurture your emotional and physical health, such as mindfulness practices, therapy, or joining support groups like the "Worthy Everything" community. Address unresolved stress and trauma, which may be contributing to physical ailments, and explore potential links between family trauma and conditions like ADHD or PTSD. Use journal prompts such as "Why is it so important to me that I make my family happy?" to explore your motivations and desires, helping you move towards a life filled with freedom and abundance.
Begin a journey of self-discovery to understand your true identity beyond familial labels. Engage in activities that nurture your emotional and physical health, such as mindfulness practices, therapy, or joining support groups like the "Worthy Everything" community. Address unresolved stress and trauma, which may be contributing to physical ailments, and explore potential links between family trauma and conditions like ADHD or PTSD. Use journal prompts such as "Why is it so important to me that I make my family happy?" to explore your motivations and desires, helping you move towards a life filled with freedom and abundance.
Journaling Prompts
Prompt 1: Why is it so important to me that I make my family happy?
Prompt 2: Where can I put myself first, today and every day?
Prompt 2: Where can I put myself first, today and every day?
Conclusion: Your journey to independence and self-discovery starts with acknowledging that the burdens placed upon you are not yours to bear. It's time to break free from the expectations that have overshadowed your dreams. Embrace your true self, redefine what independence means to you, and let go of perfectionism and people-pleasing tendencies. By releasing these inherited patterns, you open the door to a life filled with freedom, abundance, and genuine self-love. This is your time to step into your power and live life on your own terms. Your future is yours to create, and it starts with choosing yourself.
Last episode of the season join my email list here to stay upto date on Season 2 coming soon. We will have guests, Q&A, and coaching episodes where I help you.
If you want to apply to be guest or for spot to be coached by me email.
Last episode of the season join my email list here to stay upto date on Season 2 coming soon. We will have guests, Q&A, and coaching episodes where I help you.
If you want to apply to be guest or for spot to be coached by me email.
thefcconsultant@gmail.com
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A slick website and stellar SEO aren’t the cornerstones of a thriving business. It's time to challenge this conventional wisdom and embrace your true power a healthy mindset. Let’s talk about the deep connection between aligning business strategies with personal energy types and the transformative process of trauma healing. I critique the monotonous marketing tactics used by high-earning coaches and stress the significance of creating authentic, meaningful content that truly reflects the depth of your work.
Moving beyond cookie-cutter courses and generic approaches, we delve into the essence of discovering your unique business strategy through understanding your human design. This episode is all about empowering you to find your path and align strategies with your authentic self. We rally against the misconceptions surrounding mindset work, exposing the superficiality of typical affirmations and emphasizing the need to address subconscious blocks for true transformation and success.
Embracing a mindset where money flows effortlessly is not about idolizing successful figures but creating offers that resonate with your personal passion. This journey is about cultivating genuine success without the burden of external benchmarks. Connect with me as I share my excitement and gratitude for our ongoing journey, inviting you to engage with me on social media. Let’s reclaim your power and unlock the financial growth you’ve always dreamed of, one genuine connection at a time.
Episode Highlights:
Reclaiming Power and Creating Money:
High-earning coaches use homogeneity in marketing tactics, amnd often promote overpriced courses with limited transformative value. The true cornerstone of a successful business is a healthy mindset that detaches self-worth from business outcomes.
High-earning coaches use homogeneity in marketing tactics, amnd often promote overpriced courses with limited transformative value. The true cornerstone of a successful business is a healthy mindset that detaches self-worth from business outcomes.
Discover Your Personal Business Strategy:
No more relying on cookie-cutter courses and generic strategies. We need to emphasize the significance of understanding your human design to guide interactions and business strategies. This personalized approach empowers entrepreneurs to discover their potential and align strategies with their authentic selves. A misconception is that tackling deep subconscious blocks will help bring meaningful change. For instance, entrepreneurs are encouraged to explore their human design for a more personalized business strategy.
No more relying on cookie-cutter courses and generic strategies. We need to emphasize the significance of understanding your human design to guide interactions and business strategies. This personalized approach empowers entrepreneurs to discover their potential and align strategies with their authentic selves. A misconception is that tackling deep subconscious blocks will help bring meaningful change. For instance, entrepreneurs are encouraged to explore their human design for a more personalized business strategy.
Aligning Mindset for Business Success:
It’s important to spend time in the subconscious mindset to remove self-sabotaging habits and unlock success. By practicing somatic and subconscious work, entrepreneurs can detach from and clear blocks hindering success. The focus shifts from idolizing successful figures to creating authentic offers aligned with personal passion, cultivating genuine success without external pressures. An example is to practice subconscious work can help clear blocks and foster genuine business success.
Three Action Steps to Take:
Identify Areas of Obsession: Reflect on your business activities and pinpoint one area where you are excessively focused on something that doesn’t truly contribute to your success. This could be obsessing over minor details like the number of emails in a sequence or the timing of social media posts, which may not have a significant impact on your overall business growth.
-I want you to identify one area of your business you are obsessing over that doesn't truly matter. Where are you obsessing over something in your business that really doesn't matter? Where are you obsessing over something in your business that really doesn't matter?
Identify Areas of Obsession: Reflect on your business activities and pinpoint one area where you are excessively focused on something that doesn’t truly contribute to your success. This could be obsessing over minor details like the number of emails in a sequence or the timing of social media posts, which may not have a significant impact on your overall business growth.
-I want you to identify one area of your business you are obsessing over that doesn't truly matter. Where are you obsessing over something in your business that really doesn't matter? Where are you obsessing over something in your business that really doesn't matter?
Integrate Subconscious or Somatic Practices: Replace some of your current business strategies with practices that address deeper subconscious blocks. This could involve engaging in EFT tapping to release limiting beliefs around money or trying a self-love hypnosis to overcome fears related to business growth. The goal is to foster a mindset that aligns with your personal energy and passion.
- Replace one of those areas with a subconscious or somatic practice, for example, doing an EFT tapping practice on limiting belief around money or trying a self-love hypnosis to release any fears that you have about your growth.
Question Beliefs About Worthiness: Begin to critically examine your beliefs about your worthiness for success. Consider journaling on prompts such as what aspects of your business you feel compelled to do because of external pressures and identify somatic or subconscious practices that can help address these deep-seated beliefs. This introspection can lead to a more aligned and authentic approach to your business endeavors.
- Begin questioning your beliefs about your worthiness for success.
Journaling Prompts
Prompt 1: What am I obsessing over in my business that doesn't actually matter, but I feel I should be doing because everyone says I should be.
Prompt 2: What somatic or subconscious practice can I start to implement today that will address the deep blocks in my mindset or my business?
Prompt 2: What somatic or subconscious practice can I start to implement today that will address the deep blocks in my mindset or my business?
Conclusion: Business success stems from aligning your mindset with your unique strategy, not from chasing superficial benchmarks set by others. It's about embracing your authenticity, addressing subconscious blocks, and cultivating genuine connections that resonate with your passion. Stop following cookie-cutter approaches and begin crafting a business path that truly reflects who you are. Empower yourself by trusting your inner wisdom and creating from a place of alignment, not desperation. This journey is yours, and it's time to unlock the financial growth you've always dreamed of, one authentic step at a time.
Next week’s episode we're talking about eldest daughter syndrome. So much of the reason why you have zero belief in yourself and why you want to follow everybody else's strategies, because you want to be successful so badly in order to please your parents. And that is one of the biggest symptoms of eldest daughter syndrome. Even if you are grown as hell 35, 40 years old, living in your house by yourself you still want to please your parents.
Next week’s episode we're talking about eldest daughter syndrome. So much of the reason why you have zero belief in yourself and why you want to follow everybody else's strategies, because you want to be successful so badly in order to please your parents. And that is one of the biggest symptoms of eldest daughter syndrome. Even if you are grown as hell 35, 40 years old, living in your house by yourself you still want to please your parents.
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After enduring the emotional whirlwind of birth trauma and initially leaning on antidepressants for relief, I discovered that true healing required confronting emotions head-on. Join me as I unravel the layers of emotional distress, challenging the notion that spa days and social media trends can heal deep wounds. Together, we question society's quick-fix mentality, exploring the deeper roots of health, self-worth, and mental well-being.
Societal pressures often lead us to believe in superficial solutions, but real progress lies in embracing the uncomfortable task of facing trauma directly. I share my journey of transitioning off SSRIs, highlighting the challenging yet rewarding path to emotional clarity that goes beyond medication. Cutting toxic people from your life isn't enough—true transformation involves healing the underlying patterns and reclaiming your personal power and identity.
Shifting focus from external blame to internal growth, this episode invites you to explore the concept of being a vibrational match in life. By addressing unresolved issues and engaging in introspective practices like EFT and hypnosis, we can break free from recurring negative patterns. I encourage aspiring entrepreneurs to harness this transformative mindset as they embark on building six-figure businesses, assuring them that they're not alone in their journey toward success and self-mastery.
Episode Highlights:
Exploring True Healing vs. Temporary Fixes:
Genuine healing requires addressing root causes, not just symptoms, and engaging in meaningful approaches.
Exploring Healing Beyond Temporary Solutions:
Spa days and surface-level self-care may not address deeper emotional issues, and quick fixes like weight loss meds may not address underlying health and identity issues.
Going Beyond Temporary Healing Solutions:
Going Beyond Temporary Healing Solutions:
Unresolved issues and unhealed wounds can lead to patterns of attracting negative relationships. Somatic work is necessary for true healing and transformation.
Three Action Steps to Take:
Identify Avoidance Areas: Reflect on the aspects of your life where you're using temporary fixes instead of pursuing genuine healing. This could involve activities like spa days, relying on medication, or cutting people off without addressing the underlying issues. Acknowledge these areas and be honest with yourself about where you might be avoiding deeper emotional work.
Identify Avoidance Areas: Reflect on the aspects of your life where you're using temporary fixes instead of pursuing genuine healing. This could involve activities like spa days, relying on medication, or cutting people off without addressing the underlying issues. Acknowledge these areas and be honest with yourself about where you might be avoiding deeper emotional work.
Commit to Deeper Healing Actions: Choose a specific action that goes beyond surface-level healing. This might involve scheduling a therapy session, starting a daily journaling practice, or exploring somatic healing techniques such as Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) or hypnosis. The goal is to engage in practices that facilitate deeper introspection and healing.
Track Your Healing Journey: Create a healing journal to document your progress. Record the areas you're working on, how you're feeling, and the steps you're taking toward deeper healing. This practice can help you maintain focus on your personal development and recognize patterns or breakthroughs in your journey toward genuine emotional liberation and empowerment.
Journaling Prompts:
Prompt Action Step: Take a moment to identify where you're using a temporary fix, like spa days, meds, cutting people off, instead of pursuing real healing. Have this moment with yourself. Give yourself this moment, bask in it. Nobody's judging you.
Conclusion: True healing is an inside job. It's about confronting your deepest emotions and breaking free from superficial solutions that society often promotes. You have the power to transform your trauma into a source of strength, moving beyond temporary fixes like spa days or medications. By embracing introspection and facing your core wounds, you can create lasting change and empowerment. This journey isn't easy, but it's essential for reclaiming your personal power and achieving the life and business success you desire. You are capable of more than just surviving—it's time to truly thrive.
Next week’s episode we're talking about what you actually need to start a six and seven-figure business and the foundation of that.
Next week’s episode we're talking about what you actually need to start a six and seven-figure business and the foundation of that.
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