There’s a lot of talk these days about how society has become hyper-individualistic — and while that’s not untrue, I want to make something very clear:
Individualism and self-preservation are not the same thing.
And confusing the two? That’s where the real harm happens — especially for people learning how to lead, parent, create, or exist in this world without burning themselves to the ground.
I teach leadership through self-preservation.
But the more I watch the world online, the more I realize how many people are calling survival “selfish” or equating self-preservation with narcissism.
But the more I watch the world online, the more I realize how many people are calling survival “selfish” or equating self-preservation with narcissism.
So let’s break this down.
Individualism is a Trauma Response
Let’s be real: individualism is a symptom.
A side effect of living under patriarchy and capitalism for way too long.
A side effect of living under patriarchy and capitalism for way too long.
Patriarchy tells you your worth is tied to how much you provide.
Capitalism tells you your worth is tied to how much you produce.
Capitalism tells you your worth is tied to how much you produce.
So you spend years — decades — providing and producing.
For your kids, your job, your partner, your community.
And what do you get in return?
For your kids, your job, your partner, your community.
And what do you get in return?
For most people, the answer is: nothing.
No rest.
No peace.
No support.
No peace.
No support.
And then one day, you wake up angry.
You say, What about me?
You say, What about me?
You’re bitter. You’re exhausted. You’re tapped out.
So you swing hard in the opposite direction — into me, me, me.
Into hyper-individualism.
So you swing hard in the opposite direction — into me, me, me.
Into hyper-individualism.
Into a survival response masked as self-focus.
But it’s not self-love — it’s self-protection built on resentment.
But it’s not self-love — it’s self-protection built on resentment.
That’s not leadership. That’s a nervous system collapse.
Self-Preservation Is Innate
Now let’s talk about what self-preservation actually is.
It’s not narcissism. It’s not a tantrum. It’s not spiritual bypassing.
Self-preservation is sacred.
It’s instinctual.
It’s that quiet, inner knowing that says:
It’s instinctual.
It’s that quiet, inner knowing that says:
“If I don’t take care of myself first, I’ll have nothing left to give.”
It’s not rooted in bitterness — it’s rooted in love.
It’s the difference between survival mode and sustainable wholeness.
Because someone who’s self-preserving isn’t closing off the world — they’re fortifying themselves so they can show up for it with more capacity.
When you self-preserve, you’re saying:
I want to pour from a full cup.
I want to give, but not from depletion.
I want to lead, but not from martyrdom.
I want to pour from a full cup.
I want to give, but not from depletion.
I want to lead, but not from martyrdom.
Here’s the Difference You Can Feel
The energy doesn’t lie.
Individualism repels.
It says, “I’m out for myself and screw everyone else.”
And people feel it. They walk away from it. They don’t want to be around it.
It says, “I’m out for myself and screw everyone else.”
And people feel it. They walk away from it. They don’t want to be around it.
Self-preservation attracts.
It says, “I care enough about my impact that I’m making sure I’m whole before I try to serve others.”
It says, “I care enough about my impact that I’m making sure I’m whole before I try to serve others.”
And when people feel that?
They want it too.
It inspires a ripple effect — a quiet revolution of regulated, grounded, self-led humans who still care about community because they first cared about themselves.
They want it too.
It inspires a ripple effect — a quiet revolution of regulated, grounded, self-led humans who still care about community because they first cared about themselves.
Leadership Through Self-Preservation
When you lead through self-preservation, you’re magnetic.
You’re not demanding attention — you’re embodying it.
People look at you and say:
You’re not demanding attention — you’re embodying it.
People look at you and say:
“Damn, she takes care of herself — and she still shows up with power and generosity.”
That’s the kind of energy that builds movements.
That’s the kind of leadership that heals instead of harms.
That’s the kind of leadership that heals instead of harms.
So no — self-preservation isn’t selfish.
It’s not individualistic.
It’s not individualistic.
It’s the antidote to burnout, bitterness, and performative power.
And if you’ve ever been made to feel guilty for choosing yourself —
Let me say this plainly:
Let me say this plainly:
The world doesn’t need more martyrs.
It needs more leaders who refuse to lead from depletion.
It needs more leaders who refuse to lead from depletion.
Being an eldest daughter often means shouldering expectations that start so subtly, you might not even notice them at first. Picture this: growing up, you were the one always given the dolls and cleaning playsets that nurtured you to care for others. But that might of come with hidden burdens of Eldest Daughter Syndrome, where societal and familial roles quietly shape our paths from childhood, often leading us into caretaking responsibilities that sideline our own aspirations. We dig into the roots of people-pleasing tendencies that blossom in families with emotionally immature parents and offer insights on breaking free from this cycle.
Feeling the weight of perfectionism and family expectations isn't just a mental battle—it's a physical too. Many of us in the "Worthy" community know all too well the anxiety and overwhelm these pressures cause. We explore how emotional suppression can manifest as physical ailments, and delve into the intriguing idea that ADHD and PTSD symptoms may be threads in a tapestry of inherited family trauma. Despite facing critique for tackling these topics without a medical license, we stress the importance of acknowledging and addressing our mental and physical health to enhance our well-being.
Reclaiming your independence starts by redefining what it means to truly be free. We talk about the difference between self-sufficiency and genuine independence, and how releasing unrealistic expectations allows us to embrace our feminine energy. This shift makes room for healthier relationships and personal growth, where setting boundaries becomes an act of self-love. We aim to inspire a journey toward self-discovery, encouraging listeners to reclaim their personal power and financial success.
Episode Highlights:
Exploration of Eldest Daughter Syndrome:
Alexis takes a deep dive into the psychological and emotional challenges faced by eldest daughters. She explains how societal and familial expectations often trap these women in roles that prioritize others' needs over their own. This syndrome, while not medically recognized, manifests in patterns that can significantly impact one's well-being.
Alexis takes a deep dive into the psychological and emotional challenges faced by eldest daughters. She explains how societal and familial expectations often trap these women in roles that prioritize others' needs over their own. This syndrome, while not medically recognized, manifests in patterns that can significantly impact one's well-being.
Impact of Perfectionism: Eldest daughters are often burdened with the expectation to excel in every aspect of life, leading to perfectionism.
Breaking Free from Family Expectations: Examine the pressures imposed on you by family dynamics and cultural norms. Challenge and redefine these expectations, with setting boundaries and focusing on self-care and self-love.
Embracing Feminine Energy: The concept of feminine energy as a means to achieve true independence. Embracing this energy can lead to healthier relationships and a more balanced life. The difference between being self-sufficient and being genuinely independent, is the importance of letting go of control and reducing anxiety.
Embracing Feminine Energy: The concept of feminine energy as a means to achieve true independence. Embracing this energy can lead to healthier relationships and a more balanced life. The difference between being self-sufficient and being genuinely independent, is the importance of letting go of control and reducing anxiety.
Three Action Steps to Take:
Recognize and Break the Cycle of People-Pleasing:
Recognize and Break the Cycle of People-Pleasing:
Reflect on your upbringing and identify patterns of people-pleasing and self-sacrifice that may have developed due to family expectations. Start by journaling about moments when you prioritized others' needs over your own aspirations. Once identified, consciously practice setting boundaries and saying no when necessary to prioritize your own well-being and goals.
Redefine Independence and Embrace Feminine Energy:
Differentiate between self-sufficiency and genuine independence. Consider what true freedom means to you beyond fulfilling familial roles. Embrace feminine energy by allowing yourself to relax, delegate tasks, and receive help from others. Practice releasing control over situations and trust in your decisions, which can lead to healthier relationships and personal growth.
Focus on Personal Healing and Self-Discovery:
Begin a journey of self-discovery to understand your true identity beyond familial labels. Engage in activities that nurture your emotional and physical health, such as mindfulness practices, therapy, or joining support groups like the "Worthy Everything" community. Address unresolved stress and trauma, which may be contributing to physical ailments, and explore potential links between family trauma and conditions like ADHD or PTSD. Use journal prompts such as "Why is it so important to me that I make my family happy?" to explore your motivations and desires, helping you move towards a life filled with freedom and abundance.
Begin a journey of self-discovery to understand your true identity beyond familial labels. Engage in activities that nurture your emotional and physical health, such as mindfulness practices, therapy, or joining support groups like the "Worthy Everything" community. Address unresolved stress and trauma, which may be contributing to physical ailments, and explore potential links between family trauma and conditions like ADHD or PTSD. Use journal prompts such as "Why is it so important to me that I make my family happy?" to explore your motivations and desires, helping you move towards a life filled with freedom and abundance.
Journaling Prompts
Prompt 1: Why is it so important to me that I make my family happy?
Prompt 2: Where can I put myself first, today and every day?
Prompt 2: Where can I put myself first, today and every day?
Conclusion: Your journey to independence and self-discovery starts with acknowledging that the burdens placed upon you are not yours to bear. It's time to break free from the expectations that have overshadowed your dreams. Embrace your true self, redefine what independence means to you, and let go of perfectionism and people-pleasing tendencies. By releasing these inherited patterns, you open the door to a life filled with freedom, abundance, and genuine self-love. This is your time to step into your power and live life on your own terms. Your future is yours to create, and it starts with choosing yourself.
Last episode of the season join my email list here to stay upto date on Season 2 coming soon. We will have guests, Q&A, and coaching episodes where I help you.
If you want to apply to be guest or for spot to be coached by me email.
Last episode of the season join my email list here to stay upto date on Season 2 coming soon. We will have guests, Q&A, and coaching episodes where I help you.
If you want to apply to be guest or for spot to be coached by me email.
thefcconsultant@gmail.com
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A slick website and stellar SEO aren’t the cornerstones of a thriving business. It's time to challenge this conventional wisdom and embrace your true power a healthy mindset. Let’s talk about the deep connection between aligning business strategies with personal energy types and the transformative process of trauma healing. I critique the monotonous marketing tactics used by high-earning coaches and stress the significance of creating authentic, meaningful content that truly reflects the depth of your work.
Moving beyond cookie-cutter courses and generic approaches, we delve into the essence of discovering your unique business strategy through understanding your human design. This episode is all about empowering you to find your path and align strategies with your authentic self. We rally against the misconceptions surrounding mindset work, exposing the superficiality of typical affirmations and emphasizing the need to address subconscious blocks for true transformation and success.
Embracing a mindset where money flows effortlessly is not about idolizing successful figures but creating offers that resonate with your personal passion. This journey is about cultivating genuine success without the burden of external benchmarks. Connect with me as I share my excitement and gratitude for our ongoing journey, inviting you to engage with me on social media. Let’s reclaim your power and unlock the financial growth you’ve always dreamed of, one genuine connection at a time.
Episode Highlights:
Reclaiming Power and Creating Money:
High-earning coaches use homogeneity in marketing tactics, amnd often promote overpriced courses with limited transformative value. The true cornerstone of a successful business is a healthy mindset that detaches self-worth from business outcomes.
High-earning coaches use homogeneity in marketing tactics, amnd often promote overpriced courses with limited transformative value. The true cornerstone of a successful business is a healthy mindset that detaches self-worth from business outcomes.
Discover Your Personal Business Strategy:
No more relying on cookie-cutter courses and generic strategies. We need to emphasize the significance of understanding your human design to guide interactions and business strategies. This personalized approach empowers entrepreneurs to discover their potential and align strategies with their authentic selves. A misconception is that tackling deep subconscious blocks will help bring meaningful change. For instance, entrepreneurs are encouraged to explore their human design for a more personalized business strategy.
No more relying on cookie-cutter courses and generic strategies. We need to emphasize the significance of understanding your human design to guide interactions and business strategies. This personalized approach empowers entrepreneurs to discover their potential and align strategies with their authentic selves. A misconception is that tackling deep subconscious blocks will help bring meaningful change. For instance, entrepreneurs are encouraged to explore their human design for a more personalized business strategy.
Aligning Mindset for Business Success:
It’s important to spend time in the subconscious mindset to remove self-sabotaging habits and unlock success. By practicing somatic and subconscious work, entrepreneurs can detach from and clear blocks hindering success. The focus shifts from idolizing successful figures to creating authentic offers aligned with personal passion, cultivating genuine success without external pressures. An example is to practice subconscious work can help clear blocks and foster genuine business success.
Three Action Steps to Take:
Identify Areas of Obsession: Reflect on your business activities and pinpoint one area where you are excessively focused on something that doesn’t truly contribute to your success. This could be obsessing over minor details like the number of emails in a sequence or the timing of social media posts, which may not have a significant impact on your overall business growth.
-I want you to identify one area of your business you are obsessing over that doesn't truly matter. Where are you obsessing over something in your business that really doesn't matter? Where are you obsessing over something in your business that really doesn't matter?
Identify Areas of Obsession: Reflect on your business activities and pinpoint one area where you are excessively focused on something that doesn’t truly contribute to your success. This could be obsessing over minor details like the number of emails in a sequence or the timing of social media posts, which may not have a significant impact on your overall business growth.
-I want you to identify one area of your business you are obsessing over that doesn't truly matter. Where are you obsessing over something in your business that really doesn't matter? Where are you obsessing over something in your business that really doesn't matter?
Integrate Subconscious or Somatic Practices: Replace some of your current business strategies with practices that address deeper subconscious blocks. This could involve engaging in EFT tapping to release limiting beliefs around money or trying a self-love hypnosis to overcome fears related to business growth. The goal is to foster a mindset that aligns with your personal energy and passion.
- Replace one of those areas with a subconscious or somatic practice, for example, doing an EFT tapping practice on limiting belief around money or trying a self-love hypnosis to release any fears that you have about your growth.
Question Beliefs About Worthiness: Begin to critically examine your beliefs about your worthiness for success. Consider journaling on prompts such as what aspects of your business you feel compelled to do because of external pressures and identify somatic or subconscious practices that can help address these deep-seated beliefs. This introspection can lead to a more aligned and authentic approach to your business endeavors.
- Begin questioning your beliefs about your worthiness for success.
Journaling Prompts
Prompt 1: What am I obsessing over in my business that doesn't actually matter, but I feel I should be doing because everyone says I should be.
Prompt 2: What somatic or subconscious practice can I start to implement today that will address the deep blocks in my mindset or my business?
Prompt 2: What somatic or subconscious practice can I start to implement today that will address the deep blocks in my mindset or my business?
Conclusion: Business success stems from aligning your mindset with your unique strategy, not from chasing superficial benchmarks set by others. It's about embracing your authenticity, addressing subconscious blocks, and cultivating genuine connections that resonate with your passion. Stop following cookie-cutter approaches and begin crafting a business path that truly reflects who you are. Empower yourself by trusting your inner wisdom and creating from a place of alignment, not desperation. This journey is yours, and it's time to unlock the financial growth you've always dreamed of, one authentic step at a time.
Next week’s episode we're talking about eldest daughter syndrome. So much of the reason why you have zero belief in yourself and why you want to follow everybody else's strategies, because you want to be successful so badly in order to please your parents. And that is one of the biggest symptoms of eldest daughter syndrome. Even if you are grown as hell 35, 40 years old, living in your house by yourself you still want to please your parents.
Next week’s episode we're talking about eldest daughter syndrome. So much of the reason why you have zero belief in yourself and why you want to follow everybody else's strategies, because you want to be successful so badly in order to please your parents. And that is one of the biggest symptoms of eldest daughter syndrome. Even if you are grown as hell 35, 40 years old, living in your house by yourself you still want to please your parents.
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After enduring the emotional whirlwind of birth trauma and initially leaning on antidepressants for relief, I discovered that true healing required confronting emotions head-on. Join me as I unravel the layers of emotional distress, challenging the notion that spa days and social media trends can heal deep wounds. Together, we question society's quick-fix mentality, exploring the deeper roots of health, self-worth, and mental well-being.
Societal pressures often lead us to believe in superficial solutions, but real progress lies in embracing the uncomfortable task of facing trauma directly. I share my journey of transitioning off SSRIs, highlighting the challenging yet rewarding path to emotional clarity that goes beyond medication. Cutting toxic people from your life isn't enough—true transformation involves healing the underlying patterns and reclaiming your personal power and identity.
Shifting focus from external blame to internal growth, this episode invites you to explore the concept of being a vibrational match in life. By addressing unresolved issues and engaging in introspective practices like EFT and hypnosis, we can break free from recurring negative patterns. I encourage aspiring entrepreneurs to harness this transformative mindset as they embark on building six-figure businesses, assuring them that they're not alone in their journey toward success and self-mastery.
Episode Highlights:
Exploring True Healing vs. Temporary Fixes:
Genuine healing requires addressing root causes, not just symptoms, and engaging in meaningful approaches.
Exploring Healing Beyond Temporary Solutions:
Spa days and surface-level self-care may not address deeper emotional issues, and quick fixes like weight loss meds may not address underlying health and identity issues.
Going Beyond Temporary Healing Solutions:
Going Beyond Temporary Healing Solutions:
Unresolved issues and unhealed wounds can lead to patterns of attracting negative relationships. Somatic work is necessary for true healing and transformation.
Three Action Steps to Take:
Identify Avoidance Areas: Reflect on the aspects of your life where you're using temporary fixes instead of pursuing genuine healing. This could involve activities like spa days, relying on medication, or cutting people off without addressing the underlying issues. Acknowledge these areas and be honest with yourself about where you might be avoiding deeper emotional work.
Identify Avoidance Areas: Reflect on the aspects of your life where you're using temporary fixes instead of pursuing genuine healing. This could involve activities like spa days, relying on medication, or cutting people off without addressing the underlying issues. Acknowledge these areas and be honest with yourself about where you might be avoiding deeper emotional work.
Commit to Deeper Healing Actions: Choose a specific action that goes beyond surface-level healing. This might involve scheduling a therapy session, starting a daily journaling practice, or exploring somatic healing techniques such as Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) or hypnosis. The goal is to engage in practices that facilitate deeper introspection and healing.
Track Your Healing Journey: Create a healing journal to document your progress. Record the areas you're working on, how you're feeling, and the steps you're taking toward deeper healing. This practice can help you maintain focus on your personal development and recognize patterns or breakthroughs in your journey toward genuine emotional liberation and empowerment.
Journaling Prompts:
Prompt Action Step: Take a moment to identify where you're using a temporary fix, like spa days, meds, cutting people off, instead of pursuing real healing. Have this moment with yourself. Give yourself this moment, bask in it. Nobody's judging you.
Conclusion: True healing is an inside job. It's about confronting your deepest emotions and breaking free from superficial solutions that society often promotes. You have the power to transform your trauma into a source of strength, moving beyond temporary fixes like spa days or medications. By embracing introspection and facing your core wounds, you can create lasting change and empowerment. This journey isn't easy, but it's essential for reclaiming your personal power and achieving the life and business success you desire. You are capable of more than just surviving—it's time to truly thrive.
Next week’s episode we're talking about what you actually need to start a six and seven-figure business and the foundation of that.
Next week’s episode we're talking about what you actually need to start a six and seven-figure business and the foundation of that.
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Pivotal moments in my life came when I realized that setting boundaries was essential for my independence and self-awareness. I found myself in a challenging situation with my mother, who often prioritized her needs over mine, which prompted me to make the tough decision to ask her not to follow us across the country. This decision marked the beginning of my journey toward seeking a career in California. Throughout this process, I discovered the significance of those small "aha" moments that guide us towards our true purpose, and I want you to recognize these in your own life too.
As I shifted away from traditional religion and embraced a mindset focused on financial prosperity and spirituality in 2023, my path to healing and self-discovery took unexpected turns. A seemingly routine day led to a profound emotional experience that steered me toward exploring alternative healing practices like breathwork and understanding my human design as a projector. Persistent health challenges, such as brain fog, became catalysts for embracing holistic practices and self-compassion. Through tarot card readings and past life regressions, I learned the power of self-acceptance and intuition, leading to clarity and personal growth.
Navigating family dynamics posed its own set of challenges, particularly when releasing toxic relationships. Overcoming brain fog and healing from past trauma were monumental in my personal development, requiring me to confront subconscious issues hindering my progress. A tough encounter with my brother highlighted the complexities of family dynamics, underscoring the importance of healing from past conflicts to move forward. Through these experiences, I've gained valuable insights into reclaiming power and increasing wealth, and I invite you to join our community as we pursue personal and financial empowerment together.
Episode Highlights:
Reclaiming Power and Wealth:
Personal experiences lead to understanding the power of small "aha" moments in shaping destiny and pursuing true fulfillment.
Navigating Family Dynamics and Self-Discovery:
Releasing toxic relationships, healing from trauma, and understanding family dynamics for personal and professional growth.
Building Wealth and Empowerment:
Building Wealth and Empowerment:
Empower listeners to reclaim power and increase earnings by following and engaging on social media.
Three Action Steps to Take:
Identify and Reflect on Your "Aha" Moments: Take some time to reflect on your own life and identify key "aha" moments that have shaped your journey. These are small yet significant realizations that have influenced your path towards personal growth and self-awareness. Write them down and consider how they have impacted your decisions and life direction.
Identify and Reflect on Your "Aha" Moments: Take some time to reflect on your own life and identify key "aha" moments that have shaped your journey. These are small yet significant realizations that have influenced your path towards personal growth and self-awareness. Write them down and consider how they have impacted your decisions and life direction.
Set and Enforce Personal Boundaries: Emphasizes the importance of setting boundaries, particularly in relationships that may be draining or not mutually beneficial. Evaluate your current relationships and identify where boundaries may be needed to protect your independence and emotional well-being. Start by communicating your needs clearly and be prepared to enforce these boundaries for your personal empowerment.
Explore Holistic and Alternative Healing Practices: Inspired by my journey towards self-discovery and healing, consider exploring alternative healing practices such as breathwork, understanding your human design, or engaging in tarot card readings. These practices can aid in personal growth, help overcome emotional and health challenges, and foster a deeper sense of self-acceptance and intuition. Integrate these practices into your routine to support your journey toward clarity and personal empowerment.
Journaling Prompts:
Write down your four biggest aha moments that you've had up until this point on your journey.
Prompts:
Where did you start noticing things?
Where did you start putting two and two together?
Where did you start noticing things?
Where did you start putting two and two together?
Where were you like, wait a minute?
Where did you noticeably feel a light bulb go off in your head about how it's been for you?
How you've been treated?
Where did you noticeably feel a light bulb go off in your head about how it's been for you?
How you've been treated?
Conclusion: Remember that your journey to self-discovery and empowerment is unique and deeply personal. As you've seen through my experiences, setting boundaries and releasing toxic relationships are essential steps toward reclaiming your power and achieving financial abundance. Embrace those small "aha" moments, for they illuminate the path to your true purpose. It's not your responsibility to make others understand your journey; focus on living authentically and surrounding yourself with those who genuinely support you. Together, let's continue to heal, grow, and pursue the life of prosperity and clarity that we deserve.
Next week’s episode we're talking about when you think that you're healing what you're really not, and we're going to talk about all the things that you think you're doing that are helping you heal, but they're not actually moving the needle very much for you and actually making things a lot harder.
Next week’s episode we're talking about when you think that you're healing what you're really not, and we're going to talk about all the things that you think you're doing that are helping you heal, but they're not actually moving the needle very much for you and actually making things a lot harder.
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